last week of wedding planning :: FRIDAY

Continuing our series of the last week of wedding planning for our very OWN, Kerry Devine.

It’s now FRIDAY before the wedding. Rehearsal time!

Part Three …

… next up, the WEDDING!

featured photo credit: pfe iPhone

plan on!




what day of the week should you have rehearsal dinner?

The grande finale of the wedding rehearsal week…..we submit to you a new idea.

what day of the week do you say?

The typical day of the week for Christian wedding ceremonies is held on Saturdays. So the typical wedding rehearsal is on the day before, or Friday evening, and of course follows the rehearsal dinner.

This year we had several wedding clients that opted to have their wedding rehearsal on THURSDAY before their Saturday wedding. This allowed them to have a really fun rehearsal dinner with the friends and family, as well as stay up longer. Talk about a real, pre-wedding event!

This idea has been so successful! The bride and groom get to relax on Friday and get some last minute errands if needed. They can get a good night’s rest on Friday evening without worrying about all the details and angst that comes with the rehearsal dinner.

couple caveats to remember

One way this wouldn’t work is if you have a lot of out-of-town members in your wedding party. Understood that many of them will take off Friday from work but can’t take off the Thursday as well. But if you are planning a local wedding you may want to consider this idea.

Some of you may be worried that you will forget the ceremony parts or your wedding party won’t know when to walk, etc. If you have a planner, then you are set…because all you have to do is show up and she’ll remember to tell you where to go and when. Also, you never have to remember the stuff at the altar anyway, your officiant will guide you through your vows.

featured photo credit: pfe iPhone

plan on!



what happens at rehearsal dinner?

In case you didn’t notice, it’s rehearsal dinner week.

We’ve figured out the style of the rehearsal, who to invite, and who is footin’ the bill, now we need to go over what exactly is expected to happen during this event?

what are you suppose to do?

Whether you are at a country club dinner with a served, plated meal or in your backyard, this event is suppose to be more relaxed when compared to the obvious formality of the wedding. A few things that usually happens:

  1. Toasts – this is the time anyone can give a toast. You’ll want to encourage Uncle Bob to give a toast at the rehearsal dinner as opposed to the middle of your reception with 200 friends, co-workers and extended family.
  2. Gifts – couples often will give out gifts to their wedding party. This isn’t always the case, but sometimes the gifts lend itself to be given just before the wedding so it becomes a perfect time.

If the groom’s parents are hosting the wedding rehearsal this is a perfect time for the father and mother of the groom to make a toast or welcome speech; as the focus will shift at the wedding to the bride’s father and mother.

not too stuffy

We never create timelines for wedding rehearsals, except for a beginning and ending time. Rehearsals should just happen and naturally flow.

Still more to come tomorrow. You won’t want to miss it, cause it’s going to shake up everything you’ve always thought about wedding rehearsals.

featured photo credit: pfe iPhone

plan on!



who pays for rehearsal dinner?

Still talking about your wedding rehearsal dinner….

so who pays for this shin-dig?

Most of you already know that traditionally, it is the groom’s parents that takes care of rehearsal dinner. We see that this is still pretty usual. If you have a clear vision on how you would like your dinner to flow, then you’ll want to have an open discussion with the groom’s folks.

Because technically, if they are hosting, it can be their choice of venue, food, bar needs, and decor. You’ll want to discuss finances up front so if you have certain ideas that you want to add, you may be picking up that portion of the bill.

true story:

We had a client who received $x,xxx from the groom’s parents as a gift for their wedding fund. The groom and bride applied that money towards the overall wedding budget and allocated the funds. A month before the wedding, the groom’s mother asked for a portion of the money (of the “gift”) because she had intended all along to use it for the wedding rehearsal. She had a clear vision of the decorations, food, bar, favors….all for the dinner, but didn’t communicate that to the bride. Lesson learned: Always clarify when you receive a gift of money for your wedding.

More wedding rehearsal stuff tomorrow!

featured photo credit: pfe iPhone

plan on!


rehearsal dinner; who to invite?

You want to have a fabulous rehearsal dinner, but are not sure who should attend!

who attends?

The usual custom would be to invite the wedding party and their significant others, parents of the flower girl and ring bearer, immediate family and your officiant (and wife). This is a perfect list to keep the dinner intimate and small, also reducing costs.

However, with more couples having out-of-town guests, the rehearsal dinner is growing to becoming an additional event to the wedding weekend. Why ask your family or friends to sit at their hotels when you could be spending more time with them? Also, as a host, it’s telling your OOT guests that they are special and you appreciate them taking the time to travel and attend your wedding.

how do you invite?

Rehearsal dinners should have a separate invitation sent directly to the guest. This clears up any misunderstandings such as the wedding party knowing if their spouses/significant others are invited. For OOT guests you can send a formal invite in advance or leave an invite when they check in at their hotel.

Come back tomorrow for more details on your wedding rehearsal dinner!

plan on!