seeing each other before the wedding ceremony :: part five/finale

This is the finale of  the discussion whether or not you should see each other before your wedding. We’ve talked about where the tradition comes from, how you can create a special moment and/or meeting for you two, the emotional benefits and now we’ll cover why it can help logistically.

it’s all about timing

When planning your timeline for your wedding day you will be shocked at how fast the day can go by. There is hardly enough time to get everything done! Including your wedding photos. No matter how good your wedding photographer is, it is physically impossible to get 40 formal shots of you and your extended family in 30 minutes after the wedding. Getting the majority of photos done before your wedding will free up so much time for you and your wedding party.

photo credit: walker studio artistic photography


  1. Actually being able to go to the limo after your ceremony for a true Send Off to the reception.
  2. Having more time to spend together with your wedding party between the ceremony and reception. These are the memories that you will remember and hold on to forever!!!
  3. Not keeping your guests waiting so long for your arrival. That can lower consumption of food and bar!
  4. In case of bad weather you have opened yourself up to having two possible choices for outdoor pictures!
  5. Depending on the timing of your day, you may be allowing yourself enough time to go to a second location (something fun) between the ceremony and reception to get some cool shots!
  6. Not feeling rushed, rushed, rushed!!!

confession time

When I got married, we did not see each other before the wedding, which was quite silly really. Our ceremony was outside on a beautiful golf course and our reception only a few feet away. We went with the tradition although I was totally peeking to get a glimpse of him. We had our guests wait while we finished up pictures after the ceremony. They all stayed outside and watched us, which made me feel uncomfortable because as the consummate hostess, I felt bad they had to wait. We also started losing some natural sunlight. If I had to do it over again, I would have met my husband and taken time to walk around the beautiful golf course to capture some awesome photo moments. Instead, I felt rushed and awkward after. You can see it on my face.

bottom line

It’s your decision which direction you want to go. Just whichever you choose, decide NOT to be rigid. Enjoy your day and embrace it. If your finance catches a glimpse of you rounding the corner, everything is going to be o-k-a-y. I had a client once ask me if we could hold up a sheet as she walked into the ceremony location so he wouldn’t see her until she turned the corner to walk down the aisle. Huh? Then I had another client who ran out to see her groom (she was in her wedding dress) to greet him when he arrived before the ceremony. It was spontaneous, lively, and full of love. Just what your wedding should be like. For pete’s sake people, plan your wedding….but LIVE on your wedding day!

featured photo credit: jesse and gena

Read part four of this series…


seeing each other before the wedding ceremony, part four

It’s Turkey Day….Happy Thanksgiving all. But we know that if you are about to get married, there are no days off thinking about your wedding. So we’ll continue with our series regarding the pro’s of seeing each before the wedding.

emotional benefits of seeing each other

Excitement and anxiousness are natural emotions to be expected on your wedding day. The cool thing about men and women is that they are the ying/yang to each other. I’ve had very anxious brides who once they have spent some time meeting with their respective grooms they are calmer and more relaxed. Still excited, but their anxiety level is lowered dramatically. It’s like you can visually see a weight lifted off their shoulders.

There’s also such a cool vibe between the bride and groom that is carried from the ceremony to the reception when they have met before the ceremony. The guests can feel the difference, the vendors can feel the difference and most importantly, the couple can feel the difference.

glaring contradiction of not seeing each other

I find it contradicting that on a day that should be about two people, they spend more than half the day trying to keep away from each other. In fact, family and friends go to great lengths in helping them not so much as even getting a glimpse of each other. After the ceremony, family and friends surround them for formal portraits and then it’s a rush to the reception. From there they are ushered in, eat and do more ceremonial events. Distractions come from guests and the next time that they are truly alone is back at the hotel room. Tired and worn out. Don’t you find that odd?

We’re gonna wrap this series up tomorrow by talking about the benefits of seeing each other from a logistic standpoint.

feature photo credit: jesse and gena

Read part three of this series…

Continue on to part five/finale of this series…

plan on!


seeing each other before the wedding ceremony: part three

This week the blog is concentrating on the subject of whether your should see or not see each other before the wedding. Couples want their day to be special and think that by seeing each other before the wedding they may somehow “lose” that. Let’s think this out…

what really happens when you walk down the aisle

You’ll have to trust me, since I actually have walked down the aisle before. And if you don’t want to listen to me, then please go talk to a friend that has gotten married. When you are a bride, you dream about what it will be like to have the church doors open, your arm anchored by your dad and how while you walk down the aisle,  your eyes will “lock” on your future husband’s face and it will be a moment that will surpass any other moments you have ever had.

What you didn’t take into account is the 200 other pair of eyes on you at the same time. You see your a good friend who flew in across the country just for the wedding, Aunt Betsy smiling at you, maybe a kid crying….all distracting from your focused vision on your groom’s face.

Instead, we submit to you that the walk down the aisle becomes ANOTHER “special moment” for the both of you. Trust me, you’ll still be excited, nervous and anxious. But not because you haven’t seen him or her or not because you don’t know what he or she is feeling. It will be the natural excitement that comes when you are about to get married.

Tomorrow we’ll talk about the emotional positives of seeing each other before the wedding. Get ready….there are plenty, some of which you probably haven’t considered.

featured photo credit: amy shepherd photography

Read part two of this series…

Continue on to part four of this series

seeing each other before the wedding ceremony: part two

The topic this week is exploring the positives of taking the time to see each other before the actual wedding ceremony on your wedding day. It’s understandable to want to dismiss this idea since every bride and groom wants to have that special moment during their day. That’s why when we have clients who decide to meet each other, we make it as special as possible.

the meeting

For our clients we work with the timeline and photographer to create a special moment that is just for the two of you. We arrange for the groom to wait at a location; sometimes it is at the altar, or in a room, or outside in a pretty location. We’ll ask the wedding party, family and friends to please leave the area. And then we’ll go get the bride. That’s when the bride and groom can see each other in private. The only people are the photographer and videographer (but they are quiet and at a distance as to not intrude).

what happens at the meeting?

We’re firm believers that the most important thing on your wedding day is the two of you and the fact that you are taking vows to commit yourself to another person. Picking out the flowers and colors is all good fun, but not the most important aspect of your wedding.

When a couple gets to meet before the wedding, the groom is able to take his time and really look at his bride. Notice the details of her dress, her hair, the way her makeup is done. It’s a perfect time to talk about what you are about to do, exchange gifts or love notes, cry, laugh and enjoy the fact that you are about to embark upon an interesting journey.

Take a look at these photos of some very special clients of ours; notice how each groom is looking at his future wife.

above photos credit: jordan barclay

Does any of these pics look like they “missed” out on something special or possibly, did these couples carve out a part of the day that will always be just for “them”?

Tomorrow we’ll talk about some other points as to why it’s a great idea to see each other BEFORE the wedding.

featured photo credit: jordan barclay photography

Read part one of this series…

Continue to part three of this series

seeing each other before the wedding ceremony :: part one

This week’s blog series we will be discussing the pro’s of a controversial wedding subject, “Whether or not the bride and groom should see each other before the wedding.” This topic can be a real heated debate among brides & grooms, family and friends.

author disclaimer

Before we begin exploring this debate, please take into consideration this author’s disclaimer. As a planner, I firmly believe that it is up to you to make the final decision whether to see or not see each other. It makes me, nor any other wedding vendor (namely the photographer) any difference on how you would like your wedding day to unfold. This series is going to be based upon real couples and experiences that we see every weekend. I encourage you to read with an open mind, however you should make your final decision that works best for you and your fiance/finacee.

how did this tradition start?

To put this debate into perspective, it may help to know how this tradition started. It came directly from when marriages were arranged by parents. The first time the bride and groom EVER saw each other was literally at the altar.

Kinda makes this time-old and cherished tradition a bit silly, no? There is no such thing as, “It’s bad luck to see the bride before the wedding.” Some egghead made that saying up and it has totally stuck. The person should get residuals every time someone says it!

So tomorrow, we’re going to explore ways to see each other before the wedding, but still make it something special and not just another typical day.

featured photo credit: andrew robertson photography

Continue to part two of this series…

plan on!