your courtship memoirs

This little snippet came to me via email….and I think it is pretty darn cool. Ellen at Courtship Stories sent me a blurb about her little company.

Imagine having your courtship documented by a professional writer, add your own unique pictures and bind all those precious memories into one cute little square book….that is a recipe for a good keepsake!

Ellen will interview both of you and translate that into a beautifully written storybook fairytale. Or I suppose something funny and quirky….reflective of your personality. This can be a thoughtful gift for a couple who has everything!!!!

Prices are custom, so visit her blog to find out more information!

so tell us. how did you meet your hubby?

I swear I had this topic in my blog calendar to be written about.

Okay. Well I can’t top that story but I will tell you how I met my husband (17 years ago)…… (sorry in advance for the long post but you can’t leave out the good parts)

I have to preface the story. I was living in Pasadena, California and my girlfriend Margo and I used to frequent a pool hall on the weekends, mostly Saturday afternoons. This was not a billiards hall. Or a cute bar with pool tables. Nope. It was a pool hall that was usually filled with blue collar workers and illegal immigrants. But we loved to play pool and it was cheap fun. We felt safe because the owner watched over us.

It was a Friday, August 16, 1991 and I had a long hard week so a group of us went out to dinner/drinks. We stayed out pretty late and I was getting tired. Margo came up with the bright idea of going to play pool (I learned she was frequently this establishment at night). I said, “No. I’m tired, let’s go home”. She begged me to go. I rarely ever went to the pool hall at “night” being a safety girl and all. But for some reason she talked me into it. Am I ever glad she did.

When we walked in – I spotted my future husband. Let’s just say he had the only blond hair in the place. He was playing pool with a mutual friend and somehow we ended up playing partners. He was, of course, “stuck with me” (which I later learned was orchestrated by him. I felt bad because I really sucked at pool. But he was awesome. Like, a pool shark! So he started teaching me how to shoot).

Let’s just say, cupid didn’t shoot an arrow at my heart when I first met him. Come ‘on girls. We’re at a pool hall. ‘Nuff said? But I couldn’t help but laugh the entire time we played (which was four hours, we closed the place). I’ve never laughed so hard and anyone knows…that is a direct road to my heart. I warmed up to his personality and quick wit.

When the evening concluded, we were standing there somewhat awkwardly (you know those moments) and before my future hubby could say anything, Margo speaks up, “So you gonna ask her for her number or what”? Hmph. My future husband glared at her wearily. Then he turns to me and says, “I never ask a lady for her number, but here is mine. I would love to take you to dinner sometime. But I’ll leave it up to you to call me”.

I was speechless.

No guy had ever told me that before. I usually would end up giving out fake numbers because you would get asked for your phone number so frequently. I smiled, took his number and replied, “Tell you what. Why don’t we meet down here again and you can teach me some more about how to play pool”. Ever the safety girl. That’s me.

To wrap it up…. we discovered that his older sister and my older brother worked together at the same business in the same department for years. We knew the same people! He lived about a mile from the pool hall and would play pool there all the time! How we missed each other, I’ll never know. His family and my family were members of the same religious church (a secular church that used to have branches worldwide).

It was meant to be. Did I mentioned he called his sister the day after he met me and told her that he met the woman he was going to marry? I didn’t feel that way, I made him work for my affection. Work really hard…..3 months later he asked me to marry him and I accepted! teehee. What can I say? I’m a sucker for a good pool player that can make me laugh! Fifteen years later (this July 4th is our anniversary) he is still making me laugh!

What about you? Where, how did you meet your fiancé, husband, significant other? We want to know! Leave a comment!

 

who gets the ring?

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If you were given a ring like this one over here (thanks Mrs. Kristin Fielder Buehn for showing off your bling for this post), would you give it back if the engagement came to an abrupt end?

Once the tears have dried up, the age old question becomes:

Who gets the engagement ring?

Does the bride get to keep it or should it be given back? I’ve heard many different etiquette answers to this very important question.

Scenario A:

Some say if the groom calls off the engagement, then she can keep the ring. But if the bride calls off the engagement, then the ring must be returned.

Scenario B:

I had to break out the etiquette book for this scenario. [blowing dust off the pages]

Peggy Post says this; “If an engagement is broken, the bride should immediately return the ring (unless it is an heirloom of her family). There is some debate as to whether the ring should be returned if the man is the one who broke the engagement. It makes more sense to return it, why keep this painful reminder of the end of an engagement just to be spiteful? It’s better to take the high road — move on”. source: Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette, Fourth Edition, page 12.

Uh, Peggy….some brides sell the ring for moola. 

One caveat she brings up; “If the groom should pass away before the wedding takes place, and the ring is not a family heirloom, then the bride may keep her engagement ring”.

Scenario C:

Lawyers would question, (you gotta love lawyers…sooo romantic); “What constitutes a gift”?

Some may argue if the ring is given during a holiday (Christmas, Valentines, etc) then it may be assumed that this is a “gift” which means it does not have to be returned.

Another viewpoint: courts may consider the ring a legal gift if these three things happen: 1. the donor (the person who gave the ring) showed the intent to give the ring as a gift, 2. the delivery of the ring from the donor to the donee (the person receiving the ring) and finally, 3. the donee’s acceptance of the ring.

Are we feeling warm and fuzzy yet? Not done….

Scenario D:

Courts may view the ring to be “conditional gift”. That if the event (wedding) does not occur, then the donor has the right to get the ring back. Some women (obviously those who want to KEEP the ring) argue that receiving the ring was upon acceptance to the proposal of marriage, not necessarily the completion of the marriage ceremony.

Here’s a crazy idea. Be careful who you ask to marry you. Sheesh.

 

Love to hear what YOU have to say about this?

ps Thanks Sally for the idea…..